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Godzilla 1998 Remake

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Post  Cajunstarwalker Sat Nov 29, 2008 7:15 am

"A Monster Sized Mess"

Godzilla 1998 Remake Godzilla

Back in the day I was a huge Godzilla fan. I still am and I just love seeing the giant lizard beat the crud out of other kaiju while destroying buildings and killing innocent people. It’s just good fun. So naturally when I heard about an American remake I was so excited. The trailer antagonized us with only brief glimpses of portions of the creature. This marketing strategy would later be used for the remake of “War of the Worlds” and “Cloverfield”.

However when this movie came out it was immediately met with a bombardment of critics trashing it. I was hurt. I assumed that they were all being mean to poor “Godzilla” for two reasons. It’s a remake and it can’t possibly be better than the original. The other was that Godzilla is a series of B movies starring a guy in a lizard suit. So when I saw it I was being quite ignorant of the negative word of mouth. I should have listened. It was horrible.

This awful film is brought to us by Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin. However this time they have stolen Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, and many of the cast of The Simpsons to star in this monster-sized piece of garbage.

The plot is that the French have been experimenting with nuclear weapons in the Philippines. Of course something mutates and becomes our friend Godzilla. However we don’t like this Godzilla and I’ll go into why later. Anyway the French go on a search to find it and kill it to cover up the tests but before they can do so it ends up in New York City. Of course it’s a big city. Nothing would be better than a huge playground filled with iconic landmarks eh? How clichéd. Anyway of course it’s all heck on Earth and we are treated to about ten minutes of destruction where we see maybe forty percent of the creature at a time. And then it disappears for a bunch of the movie.

After it disappears we’re stuck with a bunch of boring, totally, unlikable characters. None of which minus a select few have any characterization at all. And the writers obviously scraped the bottom of the barrel because our heroes have little to no personality. And we could actually care less if they succeed in stopping the monster from destroying their city. So by the end of the movie we get the delight and honored privilege of seeing the US Military and Navy in all of their power and immense weaponry fail to destroy Zilla. Instead of course it’s a bunch of unlikable losers who do that.

The creature has no spirit of Godzilla. The only thing that one can use to actually identify him as inspired by it is that it’s a giant lizard, has spikes on it’s back, and it’s roar is identical. And that’s all. It doesn’t even have Godzilla’s fire breath or kick rear persona. This monster for it’s size is nothing more than a giant wuss. This kaiju is only a frightened and lost animal fighting to survive. It only kills and destroys thing and there is nothing to point out that it is intentional. For most of the movie it is hiding from the military. The creature design is an abomination nothing like Godzilla although to be honest it’s cool on it’s own.

Godzilla 1998 Remake GINO2

There are so many errors in this film it’s antagonizing to even sit though this. One of the most obvious errors is the never ending changes in Zilla’s size. The writing is something you could easily find in low class fan fiction. The poor actors struggle painfully to act in such goofy situations. They do the best with the material they have but it’s so cheesy and the dialogue so vile not even an army of baby Zillas can save this mess.

The special effects on this big budget blockbuster which includes famous actors are disappointing. To see a shot of a fake looking lizard in the late nineties is unintentionally funny when you realize you were supposed to believe it was real. Just seeing a foot go down on top of Hank Azaria and him escaping because he somehow “was in between Zilla’s toe” is hysterical.

The original “Gojira” is over ten times surplus superior to “Godzilla” and it’s a shame that this movie sucks. If you’re a Godzilla fan you will hate this film and by the end of it be calling this Godzilla the worst Godzilla movie ever. However if it makes you feel any better I can offer some support. It’s at least better than “Godzilla’s Revenge”. And Toho has even disowned being involved in this film and calls the creature “Zilla”. If you’re not a fan of the series you’ll like it a lot better than fans but still find it a monster mess.

Grade: D+
Godzilla Fans: F
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Post  Cyclone Sat Nov 29, 2008 4:17 pm

Wow, that does sound like a bad movie. I was never much a fan of Godzilla though. This is a good review! Good job Cajun!
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Post  Cajunstarwalker Sat Nov 29, 2008 6:22 pm

Cyclone wrote:Wow, that does sound like a bad movie. I was never much a fan of Godzilla though. This is a good review! Good job Cajun!
I'm a huge fan of Godzilla and this movie had me crying internally when I left. =(

Thanks for commenting. Very Happy
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Post  Cyclone Sat Nov 29, 2008 7:10 pm

I actually saw this one! Then I went to Taco Bell and got an awesome toy! XD It was one of those Godzilla eggs and it had one inside along with a bunch of goop and was squishy to squeeze. My mom always hated that thing! Eventually a few years ago it popped and she threw it away!
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Post  Cajunstarwalker Sat Nov 29, 2008 8:09 pm

Cyclone wrote:I actually saw this one! Then I went to Taco Bell and got an awesome toy! XD It was one of those Godzilla eggs and it had one inside along with a bunch of goop and was squishy to squeeze. My mom always hated that thing! Eventually a few years ago it popped and she threw it away!
I got a tank that's crushed and squirts water if you push it... XD It wasn't squishy like a rubber duck it was plastic. XP I remember the commercials promoting the movie. Lol.
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Post  Cyclone Sat Nov 29, 2008 8:33 pm

Good memories. Except that it was almost impossible for a 5 year old to understand the movie!
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Post  triple h Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:00 am

i like this this movie it wasnt as great as as the japanese version
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Post  Cyclone Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:32 pm

Not everyone has to hate a movie!
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Post  J Box Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:14 pm

when i was little i loved godzilla. i liked it cuz it was fun to see a big t rexish thing beat up other big ol monsters. when i saw this movie i thot it was great! probly cuz id only seen really old godzila movies and was thrilled to see a new one. but when i look back on it now i do realize that it is actually pretty bad lol.
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Post  Cyclone Tue Dec 02, 2008 11:34 pm

I haven't seen it since the first time I saw it.
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Post  Cajunstarwalker Fri Mar 27, 2009 12:31 am

Cyclone let's hope it stays that way mate. ^_^ Good day to you sir. Wink
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Post  spartan 112 Sat Mar 28, 2009 8:38 pm

good day...to...you...english types...
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Post  gamequeen Sun Mar 29, 2009 5:17 pm

I didn't think that this movie was all that bad. Then again I am not a huge godzilla fan so that would explain why it dosn't bother me. Very Happy
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Post  Cyclone Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:57 pm

Me neither. I was about 4 when I saw it so I really didn't care XD
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Post  spartan 112 Fri May 08, 2009 11:41 pm

how do u remember that far back??
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Post  Cyclone Thu May 21, 2009 10:19 pm

I have a very, very, very good memory! XD
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